a letter from the past…………….

” MAGHIHINTAY AKO, HINDI MAGBABAGO, IKAW LAMANG ” Don’t ever think that I have forsaken all these words. Sa tingin mo ba-am I not still waiting? Please I ask you not to jump into conclusions. Do see if I have changed. See really who I am. And I do sincerely say that you were the only one.
First things first, ( a little history before we have crossed our path ) I have loved but received nothing in return. Mahabang kwento and in the course of being practical, I am asking what will happen to myself in such sordid circumstances? Am I not at all concerned with myself in love?Am I not at all interested in being loved in return? Consequently surely you know, there exist in loving the other, the desire to be loved in return. Lahat naman tayo naghahanap ng pagmamahal. It was painful, I tell you.
THEN I MET YOU..Yes YOU…….You have been the apple of my eyes because of your kindness, your giggles and everything. I do not know but it all happened very fast. All of a sudden, I was crying my heart out for you. I was desperately in love with you, alam mo yan. It was beautiful and it was very painful.
IKAW LAMANG simula pa ng makilala kita, when you first rejected my proposal, I’ve turned my feelings to ________sa pag aakalang maiibsan ang sakit na nararamdaman ko. Hindi pala.I realized, ikaw talaga ang mahal ko. Many people can prove that. And I know how painful it had hurted______. And I’mtrying to make up all my wrong doings to her by befriending her again. Alam din ni____kung gaano kita kamahal. Hindi mo lamang makita. But whats the use of telling you if you always do not believe. I have given you all the benefit of the doubt but still hanggang ngayon you still do not believe in me.Please be honest, naawa ka lamang sa akin kaya natutunan mo akong mahalin.Nevertheless, thank you for everything you’ve shown and done. Salamat sa mga ipinakita mong kagandahang loob sa akin. Sa concern mo sa akin, sa duty, sa pag uwi ko, sa kalusugan ko, sa well-being ko. Truely I am forever indebted with you and your family. Thank you very much indeed.About all your querries, you need not ask for forgiveness dahil wala ka namang ginawang kasalanan. If you do believe you have, still I will forgive you. YES, we can still be good friends ( I hope ). YES I would still be here if you ever needed my help. What are friends are for. And honestly, hindi nawalaang respeto ko sayo…Never.
I’ve taken all the hurt whole heartedly. I understand, I always do. You’re not that ready to have a commitment ( just as grown ups call it- LOVE ). They equate love as to commiting yourself to someone. I dont know. When it comes to love, they say, still I am a child.
Huwag kang magalala, masaya naman ako kahit papaano dahil alam kong masaya ka sa kalagayan mo ngayon. Sinasabi nga nila na mas nakikita ka nilang nakangiti kapag wala ako. I’ve fulfilled your wish-your freedom. You’re right. Maybe someday-somewhere-somehow we’ll know if we are really meant for each other and it doesnt really matter when. ( it reminds me of a song ).And don’t ever think that writing me, or having a conversation with me would take some precious time off me. Kapagka ikaw, time does not really matter. Para ka namang others. I would still do anything for you.
FOLLOW YOUR HEART.Just follow your heart for your heart will know, the love that’s meant for you.The love that’s going to change your world and last a lifetime through.The perfect love that’s yours alone and has been from the start,The love that you can find by following your heart. ( and with the consent of your head too ).

Bago ko nga pala makalimutan, a little reminder.

1. Take precautions in using the stairways, if you feel you’re not well, find someone who can accompany you in using the steep stairways.2. In crossing the street, para naman kasing di makakarating sa kabila.3. Always eat on time.4. Always sleep early.5. Don’t forget taking medicines if necessity permits6. And the way you carry yourself, And I guess I do not need to tell you all dahil malaki ka na.
Thank you for believing in ” MAGIC ”Thank you for making me a part of your yesterday, now I kindly ask, can I still be part of your today? ( even for friendship sake )Thank you sa parents mo lalong lalo na sa mommy mo. Thank you sa lahat ng nakilala ko sa inyo, pwedeng pass the phone? Kidding aside, THANK YOU TALAGA, JOAN.


love and care___________________I hope I can stand the test of time
TAKE A LOT OF GOOD CARE * GOD BLESS * INGAT PALAGI
* FRIENDS *


this letter is dated October 02, 1996, 11:24 p.m
I just got this when I went to my mom’s house. I was 17 years old when I received this letter from someone who treated me like a princess during those days…..sorry for all the heart ache I gave you……( childish things ) I learned a lot from you….And words are not even suffice to let you know how thankful I am for crossing my way….thank you..God bless…take care…..

My Dearest Mommy

MY MOTHER……….
♥♥♥happy mother’s day MOMMY♥♥♥
My Mom is my best friend..I tell her my secrets, I share her all my happiness and she knows all the pain & heart aches I’ve been through…She is my mentor and never been my detractor….She is my number 1 fan and supporter co’z for her I am the most beautiful daughter in this world, inspite off and despite off.& she is the only one I fully trust in this world that full of lies….
She may not be perfect…but she is the best MOM for me…We may argue at times, I may not told her everyday that I love her but GOD knows how thankful I am for having a Mother like her.
Mommy, sorry for all my shortcomings!for raising voice sometimes !For arguing with you !I’m not a perfect daughter !but I LOVE YOU SO MUCH………


thank you for being my MOM for almost 30 years now.
I may not be a MOTHER yet but surely I will be a good MOM co’z YOU taught me & show me how….iloveyousomuchhhhh..
thank you my dearest MOMMY HELEN….i ♥ love ♥ you ♥ so ♥ much ♥

Daddy's Girl...

Daddy’s Girl….I missed you….I love you…..

It’s been 4 years since you’ve gone. miss na miss na kita dy…dami kong kwento sayo, miss na kasi kita eh. Words are not even suffice to let you know how much I really missed you..un semon mo, un palo mo when I was a kid..un pag cut mo ng line ng 2 way radio..hehehe…un pagputol mo ng wire ng telephone kasi ayaw mo ko maligawan..late bloomer na nga eh..remember Dad, I was 20 when I had my first bf..takot ako sayo eh..But I knew you just love me so much..♥♥♥Thanks.
Don’t worry Dad, I’ll take good care of mommy..ayun ung bunso mo mag aasawa na ata..hehehe.hmmmm, mukhang pinagpalit na nga kme dun ng mommy eh..anyway ok lng un, matanda na sya..hahahaha..minsan nga paki batukan mo si bojoe kasi 3 na nga lng kme eh mas busy pa sya sa gf nya….mmmmm….
natatanggap mo ba un mga letter na sinesend ko sa yo ?…email na uso ngaun…basta lagi mo kme babantayan ha co’z I knew you’re always watching us, from a distance…hehehe
magkikita din tayo jan..but not too soon ha…hai..sya nga pala..wala ka pa ding apo sa kin…haisst..maunahan pa ata ako ni bojoe….o xa tama na…tanghaling tapat nag uumiyak ako dto para akong tanga..hahahaha…

Happy Father’s Day Daddy…………
pls say Hi to GOD……
i love you so much……..
i missed you………
mwaaaah….♥

Me

I have lots of friends but few really knew Me..Don't judge me, co'z I'm not a book or even a judge( lolz) .Seriously speaking, You will only understand where I am coming from if you have spend time with me ( physically or even talking with me). I have moods, sometimes too moody.. I easily get angry at times. I even had tantrums though I'm 30..( who cares? hahaha).I'm very sensitive, ouch! I hate arrogant, boastful and over confident people.I dont like people who do not have the courtesy to reply back. I hate waiting for too long coz I don't do that either.I hate traffic, I don't like crowded places, and I hate so much noise co'z I have migraine..hahahaI'm jealous at times but I never envy. I can be naughty too.. I’m always misunderstood I’m not snob, I’m just shy at first sight…I’m bossy sometimes but in a very approachable manner. I don’t drink and never smoke but people around me can do so. It’s ok. It’s your choice and mine as well. No big deal! Sometimes my promises are made to be broken ( sorry human being) When I’m so angry, I cried a lot. I said bad things though sometimes I didn’t mean it. .Im a good adviser but not with my own problems. So weak when it comes to it. Suicidal sometimes hahah..good Im still alive...I can hold on my temper but not at all times. Sometimes I really show it..take it or leave it…I’m not perfect.I may not be your ideal friend. But I am a good friend. ( you try!) on the other side, I’m a very sweet and thoughtful person. (ask them) I’m protective & if my friend got hurt, huh…get ready…! I can be your shoulder to cry on. I will listen with you all day long , rest assured you’re listening too, coz there are people who just keep on talking and never listen..,the hell with them.. I met 2 girls like that..blah blah blah…can you imagine your listening only, and your not allowed to talk? If you talk, she will never understand coz she is not listening…hahaha…hang up! The nerve with the bitch….I easily forgive and forget ( but not totally forget, it takes month) I say sorry if I hurted or offended others so I expect sorry too to those who hurts me. If not, hmmm.. I’m a drama queen, I have lots of burdens and worries about life. I’m also a comedienne , I love to laugh so hard, with tears while laughing.. yeah crazy at times. Whose not? But I’m not an action star, I’m afraid to get hurt physically, just do it by words.. I'm a BLOG person. I love to write. That's my passion. It's a relief for me. Don't read my blogs so you wont get affected. You will never like me, when I’m so angry…hahaha …Gimme atleast 2 hours before you talk to me after we argue and I can say I’m perfectly fine. I hate B.I ( Bad influence)I smiled a lot but deep inside I cried too much...( I always say keep smiling, but my heart is aching ) I'm a loner sometimes but I'd love to be with friends.You can share with me all your secret . It’s safe.. I can tell you mine. I prayed a lot.. I love GOD. I give my trust easily even we just met once. That’s my problem. Do not hurt my family, I will kill you..I love my Mom the most……My first heartache was when my first love / bf died when I was 20….huh..can’t believed I had survived. I was 27 when I lost my Dad…most painful……and never get over the feelings yet. I love kids though I don't have one. that's my frustation in life. never do it as a joke. To sum up, I have lots of imperfection……It’s up to you now. Be my friends or be my Enemies.Love Me or Hate Me. Or do not exist…..yeah… but never judge me……….